June 16th, 2006

Not Happy

FIltered to Evey

Okay. Evanna, this was originally a post just to me, but I need you to see it. Because you...you're the only one here that's not letting herself get dragged into this. And...if I left I would want you with me. So...read.

http://www.uct.ac.za/ -Drama Course

http://www.chico.mweb.co.za/art/theatre/listing/theatre-ct.htm
http://www.discoverthecape.com/theatre.html

Send headshots...

I can't believe I just did that. I am actually looking up places in Cape Town to work and go to school. And I fucking looked for apartments too. There's one that's available in August that I emailed for more info about.

I must be crazy.

Well yes. And it's all of YOU that are doing it to me. I love Renee but I can't stand this. I'm not good for her. I can't help her. She's...got issues and she needs someone that doesn't snap at the drop of a hat to take care of her.

Good god, she needs a Scarlett.

If she was TALKKING TO HER.

AughFUCKYOUALLANDSHOVEITOUTYOURFUCKINGARSEHOLES

Shit.


EDIT:

I wonder if Melissa woulc come... http://www.capetowncityballet.org.za/
  • Current Mood
    angry angry
Just breathe

Filtered to Melissa

Melissa I...I need to talk to you.

I want to move.

I want to go to Cape Town, South Africa. I have to get out of here. ONce Renee is better, I'm leaving.

And...and I want you to come with me?

http://www.capetowncityballet.org.za/
I looked this up for you.

EDIT: Forget I said it. Just...nevermind. I'm dumb. I'm sorry. Just the thought if leaving you here was scary, but it's okay. I can do it.

You stay here with your family and friends, and I'll go be with mine.
Anywhere but here

(no subject)

I've made too many mistakes today to count.

God I am so stupid.

This whole thing is too much. Too much all at once. I can't do it. There's kidnaps and fucking...well..things I shall not speak of. And fighting and watching people I love hurt for no reason. When they did nothing wrong. Why does it keep happening?

And happening and happening.

Phone's ringing.

And after I answer it I am going out and I dunno if I'll be back tonight.
  • Current Mood
    embarrassed embarrassed
Cry Cry

Unreadable to Tasha and Renee

Oh fuck me.

Okay, Renee's doctor called me. She has Paranoid Personality Disorder, officially diagnosed and everything, and Tasha is feeding her utter bullshite and Renee believes it and now...

I don't even know what to say. She believes everyone is against her except apparently Tasha and I and I don't think I have such a great foothold anymore either.

Her doctor says don't support her delusions but try not to talk about them either, and the doctor will try to do the rest. Because if you argue with her, she'll think that you're against her as well and if she thinks no one cares she could...

She might hurt herself again.